Criptic Critic Conscience and Known for it

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

freedom depicted. 1999

suppressed

I Saw freedom
tonight
depicted for me

It wasn=t beautiful
It was a man high on drugs alone

In a room
alone
with Junk, Rubbish rotting food & liquid

lights On T. V=s on
simultaneously Different channels
while he typed

his head out over on

ago

He was looking for a distinctly American
dream
Though he wasn=t presented like how
we dream
freedom to be


I Knew he was free

because here in N.Z
There is no dream
There=s what ever I say
In a room alone writing out
over walls on History.
What happened a long time ago.

1 comment:

  1. Hey Tao - cause you mentioned you were in to editing now I thought I would put my 2 cents in in terms of possible edits. I just started hacking. I am not suggesting that my edit is better - just thought you might like to see what my brain makes of it.


    suppressed

    I saw freedom
    tonight

    a man high on drugs alone

    in a room
    with junk, rubbish,
    rotting food & liquid

    lights on, TVs on
    different channels simultaneously

    he was looking for a distinctly American
    dream

    but not like how
    we dream
    freedom to be

    I knew he was free

    because here in N.Z
    there is no dream
    there's only whatever I say
    in a room alone writing
    on walls over history
    what happened a long time ago


    Love-
    D

    ReplyDelete